Talk to the Human™

I just had a really great time at the Champions Edge lunch here at the Convention. Mark Brown (1995), Darren LaCroix (2001) and Lance Miller (2005) were all in attendance. There were about 30 Edge members there as well, and I had a really good time making some new friends and swapping stories with fellow Edge members.

One of the cool things we did as an icebreaker was “2 Truths and a Lie.” How you play is everyone tells 3 interesting things about themselves, and the group tries to figure out which of the 3 is not true. For me, I plugged my new website, SpeakerBlogger.com, mentioned the fact that I have climbed Mount Fuji to the top and also that I once climbed on the Hollywood letters on that hill here in California. Turns out I do have a new website, I have climbed that hill and onto those letters, and I have climbed Mount Fuji…just not to the top.

If you haven’t checked out World Champions Edge, (affiliate link) it is a great resource for speakers. Check it out, right after you surf over to http://www.SpeakerBlogger.com.

Next…on to the Accredited Speaker Program.

The second day of training is over, and I think I speak for 248 Toastmasters when I say, “I am spent.”

Today’s sessions were really great, and over the two days, I easily absorbed enough material for 5 speeches. In fact, I should generate some working titles while I think about it:

How a free breakfast really motivates the team
The need for leaders
New ways to support ID (International Director) visits
Providing better communication and standards
Why Rory Vaden is the right choice for our Fall Conference

That last one is based on two things:
1. Rory Vaden is our guest speaker at our coming Fall Conference in Overland Park, KS
2. He gave a fantastic presentation at out leadership training on the advantages of self-discipline

Other cool things that happened – I ran into more friends from last year’s convention, including 1995 WC Mark Brown and 2001 WC Darren LaCroix.

Next, the opening ceremonies are at 7pm. I’ll have another segment ready to post later this evening.

Do you sometimes receive feedback that you don’t really want (or don’t even need) to hear? How does it make you feel to receive unsolicited feedback? 

In fact, does it matter if the unsolicited opinion comes from someone you totally respect or someone you don’t even know?

It’s human nature to notice perceived flaws and to look for ways to fix them. It’s even becoming a normal practice in society to go to that person with the potential flaw and offer up a suggestion just to help. I’ve seen this countless times at Toastmasters contests, and I’ve observed the facial expressions of the recipients (and yes, I have done it myself).

Last year I attended the Toastmasters International Convention in Connecticut. Early in the week, some of us were fortunate to be able to watch a finalist in the coming World Championship of Public Speaking (WCPS)  practice her speech.

I really like the rule that the World Champs used for this session: after the speech, we were encouraged to provide positive feedback to the contestant – one each. If any of us thought we saw some improvement that just had to be said, we were to hold that comment and provide it to one of the champs (5 were present). Then they would collaborate and work with the contestant to provide the improvements that in their experience would help her out.

That led me to a couple of good rules we can all follow, whether in our Toastmaster club environments, or in the business world:

1. Positive comments are rarely solicited, so be sure to offer them generously when they are deserved. Bonus hint: They are always deserved.

2. Unsolicited critiques are almost never appreciated. Avoid offering your evaluation unless you’re asked. Note: You are not the exception to this rule.

3. Consolidate improvement where possible. I don’t mean gang up (i.e. “12 of us thought you should pause longer, so I was elected to tell you”), but you should avoid a steady stream of 2-3 improvements from multiple sources.

In Good Guys, a new comedy/drama/cop thing on Fox, the lead character asks his boss why he can’t move into a more exciting job in the department. As an example of his behavior, She offers “You corrected the Captain’s grammar…in front of the Chief.” Instead of realizing his mistake and moving on, he responded “There is no ‘statue of limitations.’”

Giving a critique to someone, even if you are completely right, is not some sort of constitutional right. You’ll be more successful with your opinion if it’s solicited, and you’ll be more effective when the recipient is receptive. Remember to stay positive, and only give critiques to those who actively seek your opinion.

One of the things I like to do is read books written by people I know. Darren LaCroix impressed me with his Get Paid to Speak by Next Week program and boot-camp way back in 2009, so I recently acquired a copy of his book Laugh & Get Rich,written with co-author Rick Segal.

The book’s tag-line is How to Profit from Humor in any Business. I enjoyed the humor throughout and found it packed with great ideas, references and stories about success in businesses big and small. The nice thing about this is that it could appeal to a rather broad audience. The assertion is that no matter where you are in any size organization, you can make a difference by properly using humor in day to day activities.

It did feel as though most of the references applied best to customer-facing jobs. However, the examples could apply equally to internal customers, which basically means any human you deal with on a day-to-day basis.

Of particular interest was a method that Darren taught me in August 2009 about how to develop an analogy to help make your point clearer and more memorable (chapter 29). I like this method when I learned it and it was great to see this chapter explain such a useful proces in great detail.

What’s great about this book:
Broken down into short chapters to allow you to find the information you are looknig for quickly.
Not limited to small business applications, many examples include companines like Southwest Airlines, Bose, and other large companies.
Lots of examples and some useful “how-tos” you can use.

Limiting Factors:
Some of the short chapters seemed a little too short for the topic.
A little too much of “We’ll get to that later”, but they did seem to keep their promises.

Great Quotes:
“People don’t want to go to a furniture store, they want to be entertained” – Barry Tatelman, Jordan’s Furniture
“If an idea doesn’t have a bit of absurdity, then it has no merit” – Albert Einstein
“Unhappy employees + more money = rich, unhappy employees” – Alan Weiss

Recommendations:
This book is an excellent eye-opener and is easy to digest. I’m going to be super-candid here – the short chapters make this one great for the bathroom. Oh yeah, there are some points that make it a great reference later on.

Rob’s Rating system (bolded, the rating is)
Buy at full price (I admit to a small amount of bias, but you can get it at a discount)
Buy if you get a discount
Wait for the paperback
Wait for someone else to be done with the paperback
If you’ve read my reveiw, you got the jist of it

I just received Darren LaCroix’s two new CDs, Secrets from a World Champion Speaker Coach and Speak Outside of Your Club for Fun, Profit, and Club Building. Both are single CDs and less than an hour each. This means I should be able to listen to both of them on my drive to Topeka tomorrow morning, bright and early.

This weekend is our Toastmaster District 22 Fall Conference, and we’re featuring another World Champion, Ed Tate. Ed will be our opening keynote speaker on Saturday morning, present an educational session in the afternoon, and lead a Breakfast with a Champ question and answer session Sunday morning.

During the day tomorrow, I’ll be working with our International Director and accompanying him on a club visit to the Veterans Center in Topeka, and for a Radio Interview on WIBW 580 AM at 1:35pm, 20 November. I’ll add the podcast link here as a note after the interview. The talk show is the Raubin and Megan show.
Update: Here is the link to the podcast (MP3).

If you’re in the area and interested, you can find info on the conference at our district’s website. Meals are probably sold out, but you can still attend the events, educational sessions, and contests.

I’ll post on Ed Tate’s speeches and the overall events on Sunday night, weather permitting…

Are you wondering how I can have a back cover to a book that isn’t written yet? Some folks will tell you that it’s an important exercise to write the back cover first for a couple of reasons:

1. Coming up with what others will say about your book can help you focus on what will actually go in it.
2. It can serve as a catalyst for the process of putting your actual content together.

Please note: The quotes in this post are (currently) fictional. They are representative of who/what I’d like to see on the real back cover of my book, but I may only get my wife, son, and a cousin or two to endorse it. You never know.

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Talk to the Human – real world techniques for getting communication off-line and on-point.

Here’s a taste of what you’ll learn from Talk to the Human™:

- Leading-edge tactics for turning leading-edge communications into real, live results-driven dialog

- 3 Keys for developing better communications by building a better foundation, preparing for success, and succeeding in the moment

- Dozens of methods to get results today in your business through better communication

What real Humans are saying about Talk to the Human™:

“Get off of the E-train and back to real life dialog. If you’re looking for a strategic advantage in your live business communications, read this book” – Business Week

“If you’re looking for real methods to be successful in face-to-face communications, this book is a must read” – Bruce Tulgan, author of Not Everyone Gets A Trophy

“If you buy only one book today, this is the book!” – Scott Adams, cartoonist, author, and creator of Dilbert™

“Rob does a masterful job of teaching you methods to know and understand your audience, prepare your message, and deliver it professionally and memorably. If I would have had this 10 years ago, I’d be $1,000,000 ahead today.” Alan Weiss, author of Million Dollar Consulting

“Rob is very Funny” – Darren LaCriox, comedian, 2001 World Champion of Public Speaking, and author of  Laugh and Get Rich

“Rob’s lesson’s resonate with the speaker in all of us.” – Darren Hardy, Publisher and Editorial Director of Success Magazine

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Clearly (to me) this needs work. I’ll probably refine it as I go along, and when it’s a bit better, I’ll post a new version (maybe as a .jpg to add some color and realism to it).

By the way, I mentioned the quotes were fictional, but here’s a secret: The Darren LaCroix quote is genuine. He posted it on my Facebook page a few weeks ago.

Need a quote for your next party? Here are some that you may find useful, along with one perception of what they mean:

Craig Valentine
“What got you here won’t get you there” – from the book World Class Speaking
My thought: Sticking with what works is very Human. However, sometimes you need to make those changes to become more (or even stay) successful. In a related quote, Janet Jackson once said “What have you done for me lately?”  To be successful, you should be able to answer that question for your boss, your clients, or your family at a moments notice.  

Darren LaCroix
“I’ve never had a mentor ‘nice me into growth’” – from the August Champ Camp in Connecticut
My thought: Validation and Growth have one thing in common – they’re both words. Beyond that, they are the difference between someone telling you that you’re good and someone helping you become better.
That’s not a licence to run around telling everyone the whole ugly truth.  As I always say, know your audience and know what they need to hear, what they want to hear and what they can take. It’s just like in Toastmasters, when anyone speaks, you will have 20 things you could mention that need to be worked on. Tell me about all 20, and I may get discouraged. Tell me I was great, and nothing will change. Tell me about 3 things, and I can grow.

Ed Tate
“Review your keepers” – from the August Champ Camp in Connecticut
My thought: This was one of the most valuable lessons from the 2 1/2 days there. Why, you ask? This was a technique  Ed used, along with his “Think, Pair, Share” method to reinforce learning after each break.
Here’s how it worked:
1. At the beginning of the seminar, we were introduced to the note pages for our “keepers”, where we would write down those things in the session that were of value to us
2. After each break, we were given a moment to go over our keepers and think about what we had learned
3. Next, we would pair up with a neighbor (a different person each time) and discuss what we had on our list
4. Finally, Ed would ask everyone to share one of keepers with the group (note: in a larger group you would limit the number of “shares”)
Between each Pair and Share segment, I think everyone in the room would pick up at least one keeper that they hadn’t thought of on their own.
If you do instructional sessions, I think this is one of the more valuable techniques you could incorporate into your teaching methods.

Alan Weiss
“If you don’t blow your own horn, there is no music” – from the book Million Dollar Consulting
My thought: There’s a difference between saying that you are good, and bragging that you are better than everyone around you. It’s okay to be good and say so. A little competition can be healthy too, just know when enough is enough.
I used to know people who said that if their boss didn’t put their accomplishments in their performance appraisals (and awards), they must not have been that good. Baloney.  Whether it’s you current boss, future employers (i.e. your résumé) or a consulting client, you shouldn’t expect to be the talk of the town no matter how good you are. Be willing to say it out loud and articulate it so it makes sense.

Peter Drucker
“The best way to predict the future is to create it” – multiple sources
My thought: This is timeless. I’ll put it this way, if you are waiting for something to happen, get a piece of paper, an envelope, and a pen. Write down what you are waiting for, put it in the envelope and write today’s date on it, but add one month (i.e. if today is 30 Aug 09, write 30 Sep 09). Set it aside and open it on the date written. When you read it then, you will probably notice that you are still waiting. This method works if you add one month, one year, or 10 years. Don’t test that theory – go make that “thing” happen. Being on the right track only matters if you choose to move forward…