On Scott Adam’s Dilbert Blog, Scott issued a challenge to write a piece of <500 words in his comment section, with the goal of creating a piece worthy of publication and the attention and adulation of the Dilbert Community.
This challenge stemmed from his post the day before, where he asked his readers if they would be willing to write a piece for the NY Times, without pay, just for the attention. I’m guessing that he doesn’t quite have the juice to get anything he wants into the NY Times (he may be great…but he’s no Oprah). With that, his challenge was to create something to be posted as a guest post on his daily blog (which is one worth reading, by the way).
You’re probably asking, “Rob, you are such a great blogger, you must have accepted the challenge, right?” Thank you for the compliment, and yes, I did write a short post. I went with the “quick and short” option instead of the “take all day to make it perfect” approach.
Rather than make you search for it in the comments (it’s very near the beginning of the comments section), I’ll repost it here. The rules were <500 words with a <50 word self pitch at the end:
Does it pay to be first?
One of my old pointy-haired bosses used to say that 90% of success is just showing up. Another one called it 80%, and I’ve even heard it quoted as high as 99%. My conclusion: 100% of success with statistics is saying it like you mean it. And oh yeah, it help to be the first one to say it.
This is especially true with advice. People remember what they hear first and what they hear last. Everything else is just 100% drivel (according to a study I may have read). That means that being first gives you a 50/50 chance of being paid attention to. Since you can’t control if you are last (without, say, hacking the blog), being first becomes even more important.
Along those same lines, have you heard the statistic on communication that says 93% is non-verbal and only 7% is what you say? You know that study is misquoted nearly 100% of the time (so I’m told)? It was about first impressions, not communications in general. That non-verbal is obviously important in that first impression, but once they know you, your words better make sense more than 7% of the time. Otherwise you are 100% likely to be last in that persons mind.
And even that will only last until the next yahoo speaks up…
Read Rob’s blog at www.talktothehuman.com. There is good stuff there; I’m 100% sure!
Not perfect, but maybe Dilbert worthy. If you agree, go to the comments section and vote it up for me.
Editor’s note: Dilbert is a copyrighted comic strip written by Scott Adams that shows the humorous side of working in the cubicle world.
I clipped Dilbert’s daily comic strip from my birthday in October and had it on my cubicle wall at work. In that strip (you can read it and come back), Dilbert is looking for approval on a new project, and the answer from the pointy-haired boss says “We agreed on a predecisional draft framework for making the decision”. When I showed this to a couple of friends at work, it caused a bit of discussion about how that type of language makes it’s way into those comics, and we pondered how we could use similar language in future meetings to liven up our own workcenter.
We came up with a postcomical draft framework for some other seventh-sigma-quality phraseology for use in the workplace, both ours and yours:
post pre-meeting discussion
version 2.0 of our predecisional draft framework
Static Predecisional Dashboard
Dynamic Predecisional Dashboard
Here are some examples of their use:
Have you ever had a pre-meeting to discuss something before the meeting? It was suggested that we plan (or not!) a post pre-meeting discussion to agree on the predecisional framework. Of course, this discussion being post (i.e. after) the pre-meeting would imply that it’s between the pre-meeting and the actual meeting. Here’s the beauty: this could happen before or after that meeting, or better yet before the main pre-meeting that finalizes some of the efforts you couldn’t resolve in the first pre-meeting and don’t want to waste time on in the actual meeting.
Version 2.0 of our predecisional draft framework would be one if the products of either the post pre-meeting discussion, from the final pre-meeting, or most likely from the MS Outlook tentative meeting attendance replies that include useful responses such as “already triple booked” and “how do I direct dial from Ecuador?”
The Static Predecisional Dashboard would be a graphic representation displayed on the monitor of your computer, a sheet of paper or an Etch-a-Sketch to show where management is in the process of approving your project. The Predecisional Status would always show “green” (since the draft framework is obviously in place). The Project Approval Status would show “in work” until project closure (when you wad up the dashboard page and burn it). Finally, the Next Update would read “Waiting on post pre-meeting discussion approval of the next release candidate of version 2.0 of the draft framework”.
The Dynamic Predecisional Dashboard is on hold pending project approval. For regular updates, check the Static Predecisional Dashboard for the Dynamic Predecisional Dashboard Project that is hanging up over my bosses second (unplugged…shhh) 24-inch wide-screen monitor.
Scott, if you read this please feel free to use any of this in your comics. Beetle Bailey and Ziggy will need permission from the author…
Are you wondering how I can have a back cover to a book that isn’t written yet? Some folks will tell you that it’s an important exercise to write the back cover first for a couple of reasons:
1. Coming up with what others will say about your book can help you focus on what will actually go in it.
2. It can serve as a catalyst for the process of putting your actual content together.
Please note: The quotes in this post are (currently) fictional. They are representative of who/what I’d like to see on the real back cover of my book, but I may only get my wife, son, and a cousin or two to endorse it. You never know.
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Talk to the Human – real world techniques for getting communication off-line and on-point.
Here’s a taste of what you’ll learn from Talk to the Human™:
- Leading-edge tactics for turning leading-edge communications into real, live results-driven dialog
- 3 Keys for developing better communications by building a better foundation, preparing for success, and succeeding in the moment
- Dozens of methods to get results today in your business through better communication
What real Humans are saying about Talk to the Human™:
“Get off of the E-train and back to real life dialog. If you’re looking for a strategic advantage in your live business communications, read this book” – Business Week
“If you’re looking for real methods to be successful in face-to-face communications, this book is a must read” – Bruce Tulgan, author of Not Everyone Gets A Trophy
“If you buy only one book today, this is the book!” – Scott Adams, cartoonist, author, and creator of Dilbert™
“Rob does a masterful job of teaching you methods to know and understand your audience, prepare your message, and deliver it professionally and memorably. If I would have had this 10 years ago, I’d be $1,000,000 ahead today.” Alan Weiss, author of Million Dollar Consulting
“Rob is very Funny” – Darren LaCriox, comedian, 2001 World Champion of Public Speaking, and author of Laugh and Get Rich
“Rob’s lesson’s resonate with the speaker in all of us.” – Darren Hardy, Publisher and Editorial Director of Success Magazine
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Clearly (to me) this needs work. I’ll probably refine it as I go along, and when it’s a bit better, I’ll post a new version (maybe as a .jpg to add some color and realism to it).
By the way, I mentioned the quotes were fictional, but here’s a secret: The Darren LaCroix quote is genuine. He posted it on my Facebook page a few weeks ago.